The Myth: "Stop Talking About Discrimination and it Will Disappear"

"Avoidance merely delays the inevitable, but it does not make it go away"

 "Stop Talking About Discrimination and it Will Disappear"

A Myth 

Discrimination against people of color, women, and members of the LGBT community is something that this society is still trying to work on. And while small steps have been made in the years since the Civil Rights Act of 1964, this recent election cycle has made me and everyone else aware of what goes on this nation at both a macro and a micro level. It has become evident that racism and xenophobia is alive and well in this country and that it is capable of forwarding an entire political platform. 

While it has been evident that racism is a problem, something that is troubling is the view that if we  "stop talking about discrimination and racism, it will disappear." There is a inherent logical fallacy in stating this as illustrated by several analogs:

• If we stop talking about the fire burning down the the house, the fire will stop burning it down...
• If we stop thinking about the cancer ravaging the body, it will go into remission...
• If we stop talking about obesity, it will correct itself...
• If we stop talking about rape, people will stop getting raped...

All of these logical fallacies have one thing in common: They assume that a condition will cease by ignoring it. This is the problem with the American psyche today, the lack of accountability for actions both past and present and the ability to understand the implications by not taking that accountability. There are people that exclaim "Why does it have to always be about race?!"but they fail to realize that a great deal of political decisions and instances and history were done because of race. 

The Tuskegee Experiment was carried out because of race (exploiting the fact that people of color were not well educated and that they could be used as guinea pigs. CDC Commentary ). The covenants that disallowed many African Americans to own property and produced the mass exodus of European Americans to the suburbs, was about race. ( Racially restrictive covenants: Shelley v. Kraemer , Redlining: It still exists, and Racial exclusion in suburban communities: Yale Law Journal talked about it.), even the failure to employ people is based on preferences which mainly rely on race. ( 2003 Berkley Study, Hiring of Waiters, Liability Because She Wasn't Blonde). 

Just by looking at the instances above, you can tell that the usual rule of speaking things into existence doesn't apply. It's because no matter if we are silent on it, it is inherently part of our society. To not address it as an issue is to completely fail to address what made this country what it is in the economic sense as well as the political one. 

The rationale of not talking about discrimination also is rooted in how people respond to affirmative action plans. The sentiment from many people who are not a part of a protected class is "affirmative action programs further polarize race relations by making it us against them and allowing people to not operate on merit." But once again, it complete discounts history. The history is that African Americans and most other people of color attend schools that are substandard (2013 APA Article, 2002, NY Times, 1992, The Atlantic). At first they were separate but unequal, now they are integrated (by law but in fact it could be questionable) and still mostly unequal.

 A majority of inner city public schools systems are utilized by minorities and generally they do not have the same resources as suburban school systems.( 2014, Washington Post, 2015, PhillyMag). How can we operate on a system of merits when from the instance a child sets foot through the door of the school they are ill equipped to handle and navigate the education system? Affirmative action policies are there because the help alleviate the disparities at the tail end. It is a much more conservative remedy than giving money to those struggling school systems and providing proper services that can help bring students in those inner city schools on equal footing. 

Societally, discrimination was rooted in our laws (Plessy v. Ferguson and Dred Scott, The Civil Rights Cases, Jim Crow and Black Codes) and it took legislative action via talking about the discrimination and expressing discontent that gave us Brown v. Board and it's subsequent cases. It took this conversation to get us the Civil Rights Act of 1965, 42 U.S.C. 1981, and the ADA (because people discriminate against the disabled too). It took us this conversation to get affirmative action programs that benefit all Americans who are from groups that are disadvantaged socially ( Even women who are European American benefit too). To be clear, conversations about any type of discrimination produces results whereas inaction does not make discrimination go away. Jim Crow was alive and well from 1877 until the 1950's and when it became severe and pervasive and conversations starting happening, things began to get done. 

In conclusion, we must talk about discrimination to arrive at a solution. In a 12 Step Program way, the first step is admitting that there is a problem. Until we as a country can collectively admit that there is an issue, we cannot resolve it. Everyone else sees the problem and quite clearly we cannot be post-racial until we understand that race and other bases of discrimination are a subject to examination rather than ignorance. 

From

The Battle Ongoing: A Narrative on Body Image

“To lose confidence in one’s body is to lose confidence in oneself.” 
― Simone de Beauvoir

The Battle Ongoing

Body Image Issues 

(Source: Dressmann)

I remember the the days when I was thin, free, and didn't have to worry so much about what my body looked like. Those days were in my childhood. But once I hit 11 and puberty took hold of my life and shook up my life, I began to notice that I was not growing upwards, but I was growing outwards. I went to the doctor to figure out what was going on with me, their opinion. "It's puberty, and as you develop, you're going to gain some weight... It's normal." The doctor is right,  but looking back the speed and way how I gained my weight in my early adolescence led to insecurities that reared their head quite early. 

When I was twelve, that was when I attempted to fight my weight head on. Looking back, the reason may have seemed silly... but it resounded with me. I was told by a crush after stating my interest in them that I was "too short and too fat." After being told that I decided enough was enough... I stopped eating and restricted my diet. For the first time in a long time, my body stopped growing outwards and I felt like I had succeeded. I finally had stopped the battle of the bulge. However it fix ended when my mom caught wind of what was going on and suddenly my body began to pack on the pounds quicker than ever before. 

By the time I had entered high school, I tipped the scales at nearly 200 pounds. I was upset, I was embarrassed, and most of all I was over it. A breakthrough did not happen until I attended undergrad and for the first time I actually lost weight thanks to walking a lot. During the summers, I made it my business to work out and once again my weight had stabilized. That stability ended when I started law school and since then I've been combating even more weight gain caused by being sedentary. 



Now at nearly 23, I look at my body as a battlefield. They say that men are not supposed to be so worried about how their body looks. However between the emotional pains, medical issues, and poor dating prospects the fight has taken its toll. After numerous diets, axing out entire food categories from my diet, and increasing how much I exercise, my stomach is not moving. The worst part is that I am left to merely blame myself. 

The most prominent rhetoric for many people who struggle with their weight is that the fact that they are fat is entirely their fault and that they are "lazy" and "unwilling" to change their behaviors. However, for some people like myself the genetic short straw was picked. I have a body type that is characterized by easy weight gain because it holds onto everything and poor weight loss unless I adhere to a diet of nearly no starch, bread, or fat. Even more striking is due to a family history of medical issues, this is the prime time to jump on it and I have.

Dating has even been complicated for me. It's very common to hear out someone's mouth and scrawled across a screen on an app "No fats, no fems..." or "Height-weight proportionate." Even though seeing or hearing those things no longer phase me, it does place in my mind that within the gay community the body ideal is closely tied with the hard-wiring of men to like physically attractive prospects... 

But as circumstances have changed, so has my viewpoint. I'm taking control of this battle and having it occur on my own terms. 



The first thing in trying to work on my body image issues has been to look at not losing weight but looking at trying to make healthier choices. For me, I decided that I would give up fried food for Lent and have been deciding to cut it almost  completely from my diet beyond lent.  Also, aside from fixing what I eat, I've made it my business to carve out the time to exercise or do some physical activity even though law school has consumed all of my time.

The second thing (which I am currently working on), is not trying to compare by body to someone else's. I was under the impression that I needed to have completely flat and defined abdominal muscles, a gluteus maximus that someone can chip a tooth on, and humongous arms. As I looked around, I looked at how each person's body is not exactly the same even if it was close to the "male standard of beauty." It dawned on me that perhaps, what may look like one thing on man who's 6'3 with a natural 38 inch chest, may not look the same on someone who 5'8 with a natural 43-44 inch chest. 

The third step is being happy with yourself. I know someone who does have this "dream body" and they seem like they are happy, but then I look at how they live their life and I wonder... 4 hours in the gym almost every other day, when they go out to eat they sometimes have to bring their own food, and they can't even enjoy a drink without the thought of calories ruining their day.  They are happy that their body looks magnificent but they have to limit themselves from a good portion of social life just to sustain what it is there. I cannot bring myself to that. As I've been told by one of my friends who lost weight and has kept it off is to be happy with yourself, because those same thoughts and insecurities could cause you to gain more weight or not lost any at all. 

The last thing is remembering to be patient (I am working on this one too). Most people think that fast weight loss is the healthiest and best weight loss. But many people who specialize in nutrition science and weight loss say the opposite (Don't believe me, look here). Bodies aren't made in a day, they can sometimes take months or years. Some of these people that are on Instagram showing their physiques have been working tirelessly in the gym for upwards of a year to make their bodies look that way. I have to remind myself quite often that this journey is ongoing and giving up is not an option. 

There will come a day that I will get my body back to a point where I am content with it and it is content with itself in terms of being healthy. But until then, I have to keep toughing it out. It is a battle ongoing.